Saturday, May 29 - City of Mesa Cemetery

So with everyone kind of dying on that island, I thought to myself ... "let's go see some dead people!", so it was off to lunch and the City of Mesa Cemetery, or as Loras McClimon, our fantastic tour guide referred to it, the "marble orchid". They have an odd sense of humor in Mesa apparently.

Prior to the cemetery, look what I found in the parking lot! It's that yellow hummer from the sideways world that belonged to Hurley. OK, so Jacob called him Hugo, but I prefer Hurley. Either way, I went looking for him around that hotel, but all I could find were conventioneers from the Arizona Regional Convention for Narcotics Anonymous, which is weird because I since I know what they look like they aren't really anonymous.

Anyways, we went from the parking lot over to a place we don't have on the island....Buffalo Wild Wings, or as the people I was with refer to it...BW3. It was pretty tasty, or so I was told...as a solid statue it's not like I get to unclench my teeth and eat.

From there it was off to the cemetery, where we saw many interesting things, but there were four big highlights. The first headstone was of Ernesto Miranda ....


Ernesto apparently raped a girl in Phoenix or Mesa, and was promptly arrested, beaten up pretty good, and forgotten about. Well, he hired a lawyer who got him off because as a non-English speaking citizen, he wasn't informed of his rights as an American. So no, anytime someone is arrested, they read a set of right from a little card, called the Miranda Rights...and they are named after Ernesto. In an ironic twist, Ernesto was killed in a bar fight a few years later, and the cops in Phoenix conveniently forgot to read that guy his Miranda Rights, and he was allowed to walk, just like Ernesto. Ernesto now permanently has the right, and the ability, to remain silent!

The second grave was that of country crooner Waylon Jennings...










...who I was told was the voice over guy in the Dukes of Hazzard TV Show. Waylon was originally going to be on the plane that killed Buddy Holly, but he gave up his seat on the plane to the Big Bopper, who was sick and needed to get home. Waylon eventually recorded as part of the legendary "Highwaymen", and had his foot amputed from diabetes while in a Phoenix hospital. He lived in Mesa and was buried there when he died.

The third stop was for the military, and with this being Memorial Day weekend, it was neat to see all the American flags out.









This part of the cemetery has members of the Royal Armed Forces, which is the British Army. These soldiers were training in Arizona doing flights and most of them died by crashing after getting lost in the desert and running out of gas. Not sure why they don't have British flags...

The final stop was the famous Benjamin Franklin Johnson. Ol' B.F. Johnson was a famed Mormon pioneer who came across in a covered wagon and settled in the area. This is the front side of his headstone...









Pretty neat right? Well, here is the back....












That's right..seven wives. All seven are buried near the marker. The reason I say it that way is that ol' B.F. Johnson is not buried with his seven wives...he is buried a quarter-mile away next to his parents. Together in life with seven women, and get them away from me in death I suppose. They say he had over 50 children, and has over 2,000 descendants...even as the god of fertility, I find that amazing.

And that was my big outing to the cemetery...looks a lot nicer than the one those folks on the island made near the beach. I wonder if there are diamonds in any of the ones I just saw....

Til next time!
--The Statue.